"Things Your Dog
Doesn't Want You to Know"
By: Hy Conrad & Jeff Johnson
Dear Human:
Your dog probably puzzles you. Most of us do that. And most of us would like to keep things as they are: humans in the dark, dogs with the upper hand.
But we dogs are about to let you in a little secret. Okay, a lot of secrets. We graduated first in our obedience class three times. This should tell you something. Puppies know that they're being cute. They're using you. We don't sound anything like those silly voices you use to imitate us. We hate those ridiculous names you give some of us. Moonbeam is not a dignified name for a mutt. You might want to check your herb garden for fertilizer. We are only wearing this stupid birthday hat so we can get some cake. No self-respecting dog cares about his birthday. We are not spoiled, certainly not in comparison to teenage girls. We are in charge of the house. We let you pretend that you are.
We'd be lost without you. We love you.
It's all in our new book, Things Your Dog Doesn't Want You To Know, as told to humans Hy Conrad and Jeff Johnson. Even Steve Martin (yes, THAT Steve Martin) raves about us Inside you'll find revelations such as the reason we at the sofa (leather tastes very similar to rawhide), and what we really think of the costumes you dress us up in.
I'm not alone. Ten other courageous canines have stepped forward to tell you what your dog won't - every last dirty, hairy bit of it. If you have dogs, love dogs, or have ever been baffled by a dog, this book is a must-have.
See my post from yesterday for how much I LOVED this book.
I was lucky enough that author Hy Conrad took a minute to answer some of the questions I had.
Thank you Mr. Conrad!!
The
Brunette Librarian - - I
simply love the book, "Things Your Dog Doesn't Want You to
Know," when you were writing it, did you have a favorite dog?
Gabby and Sophie are mine!
HY
I
think writers, being naturally lazy, love characters that are easy to
write for. From that viewpoint, Axelrod and Tinkberbell are total
favorites. With Axelrod, we got to write a lot of dumb dog jokes.
And Tinkerbell turned out to be the snottiest, most superior animal
on the planet, which somehow came easy to us, too.
When
we wanted to get sentimental and take the long view about what dogs
and humans mean to each other, we turned to Sophie, our old soul.
Gabby was a late addition to the pack, when we found we were missing
the young voice of a self-obsessed girl.
The
Brunette Librarian - - What
was your inspiration?
HY
Jeff
and I had wanted to do a project together for years. One night we
were watching an infomercial for a book, “Things the Banks Don’t
Want You to Know.” Two seconds later the title for a new book
came to us as a joke. Ten seconds after that we realized we had a
great book idea. We started it as a blog, which is now our website
(thingsyourdog.com).
Before we knew what was happening, we had a book deal and a mandate
to write 115 of these suckers.
The
Brunette Librarian - - How
did you come up with your secrets? Were they secrets you found out
in life?
HY
The
first 60 were fairly easy: Why do dogs love to stick their heads out
of car windows? Why do dogs dig holes in the backyard? We would do
a little research then see what made us laugh.
We
discovered that half the fun was in creating the 11 distinct
characters and having each one take us on a little journey. For
instance, we started with one story for Sarge, our working dog. At
the end he loses his job. The idea quickly came that every story
would be about him getting a new job then losing it: drug-sniffing
dog; junk-yard dog; service dog. When Sarge finally gets adopted by
a regular family, he still thinks it’s a job. But it’s a job he
likes, if he can just figure out it is.
To
get back on topic, I think the one secret we discovered is that
everyone makes up stories about what their dog is thinking. But the
great fun of dogs is that you can never really know.
The
Brunette Librarian - - Have
you seen the new blog http://dog-shaming.com/
yet? What do you think about it?
HY
We
have mixed feelings about that website. On the one hand, yes, it’s
hilarious. On the other hand, we want you to buy our book. It’s
similar to how TV writers feel about reality shows. Yes, “Jersey
Shore” is entertaining. But wouldn’t you rather watch a comedy
or drama written by trained professionals with years of experience
who have mortgage payments to make? I guess the short answer is “Buy
our book!”
The
Brunette Librarian - - Do
you have any dogs now that live with you?
HY
We both had dogs as kids. As an adult, I discovered I’d become allergic to most breeds. Miniature schnauzers, I found, are hypo-allergenic, don’t shed and are wonderfully adventurous. We are now on our third generation of schnauzers, Charlie and Nelson. The others are buried at the top of our hill in Vermont. Nelson loves to pee on the marker, for some reason.
The Brunette Librarian - - Finally, do you have a funny dog story of your own to share?
HY
We once had a dog who’d lost some of the use of his hindquarters. One day, I was carrying him through the lobby of a hotel and stopped to talk to the manager. A few seconds later, I realized Jake had just pooped in my hand. I continued standing there, talking and pretending that nothing had happened. Then we went right up to the room and both had a bath.
The Brunette Librarian - - Finally, do you have a funny dog story of your own to share?
HY
We once had a dog who’d lost some of the use of his hindquarters. One day, I was carrying him through the lobby of a hotel and stopped to talk to the manager. A few seconds later, I realized Jake had just pooped in my hand. I continued standing there, talking and pretending that nothing had happened. Then we went right up to the room and both had a bath.
Want to win a copy of
"Things Your Dog Doesn't Want You To Know"
I'm lucky enough to have a copy to giveaway.
Simply leave a comment with your e-mail, so we can contact you.
Giveaway is open until September 29th!
Good luck, you know you're gonna love this hilarious and creative book
This is my Daisy Jane - Getting ready to tell me something I didn't want to know! |
Omg! How cute is Daisy Jane reading the book?! Thank you for the awesome contest!
ReplyDeleteinthehammockblog at gmail dot com
Thanks again for taking part in the tour. I bet Daisy Jane has a few things to tell you. LOL! She's so cute!
ReplyDeleteI have a "Daisy Mae!" I adore dogs, cats and
ReplyDeletemost animals...This is definitely my kind of
book!
Many thanks, Cindi
jchoppes[at]hotmail[dot]com
A fantastic book to win and read.
ReplyDeleteI am not good at taking pictures of pets and I know this book would be a great help.
cenya2 at hotmail dot com
This sounds like a great coffee table took. I'd love to read it.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the giveaway.
mtakala1 AT yahoo DOT com
Thanks for the giveaway :)
ReplyDeleteThis book sounds so fun and true-to-life. I've often wondered what other species thought of us humans. Weird, I know. My daughter(7) loves animals and has a way with them. I'm sure we would enjoy reading this together.
monagargATyahooDOTcom
I would love this hilarious book. His story about his dog at the hotel was hilarious, haha! I wonder if the manager smelled it the whole time, lol. :)
ReplyDeleteCrystal Craig
craigcrystal at ymail dot com
This book looks absolutely wonderful. Yes please!!
ReplyDeletemarypres(AT)gmail(DOT)com
Daisy Jane is ADORABLE. I hope you don't mind if I post her photo on my facebook page
ReplyDeleteWhat a cute concept. Thank you
ReplyDeletecnadieluster(at)gmail(dot)com
Pick me, pick me, I'd love to win this one and get one up on our little Bella ;) Enjoyed the interview and I loved your review and Daisy Jane's cute pic :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for the highlight and the interview sharing. I think our Bear would like your Daisy Jane. :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks for the giveaway. mesreadsAT gmail.com